


Miraculous Pain

by Thatkidsshoes



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-05-17
Packaged: 2018-09-28 15:27:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10128203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thatkidsshoes/pseuds/Thatkidsshoes
Summary: Marinette gave him a small little smile and glanced to the side. She brushed a stray hair behind her ear in a movement he’d come to find stupidly attractive.Why was she so cute? The way she shyly looked up at him made his hand itch with the need to cup her cheek and turn her towards him. His heart beat decided now would be a great time to remind him just how much he liked her.





	1. Chapter 1

The soft light from the lamp on her desk lite the room. He should leave. He really should. He’d brought her home safe just like he’d promised. She has once again shown how resourceful she was by ultimately saving his bacon. He’d never admit it but without her he might have gotten pretty messed up.   
Marinette brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear and Chat’s sharp eyes were riveted at the way her hand settled against her jaw. He could feel it, that pull that he’d been feeling for the last while. For some reason over the past few months he’d run into Marinette on a regular basis and it was getting to the point where he felt like she was purposely heading towards the danger just so she could talk with him. Or was it that he was looking for her on his way to the akuma? He couldn’t tell anymore.   
This wasn’t good. His heart beat for Ladybug but a part of him hard started to seek out this girl that he knew so well. He knew her better than Ladybug. She was Marinette. She always thought of others first, had a heart so big he wondered how she could be that kind all the time, and she laughed. She laughed a lot and smiled and her positivity made him believe anything was possible. She reminded him of Ladybug but Marinette had been his first friend.   
Marinette noticed him staring and he quickly dropped his eyes suddenly finding the tip of his shoe very interesting. He rubbed it across the floor trying to act like he hadn’t just been thinking how nice it’d be to hold her.   
“You all right Chat?”  
He nodded keeping a steady eye on his target. “M-hm.”  
He could practically feel her raise her eye brow at him. “Don’t play dumb with me, Chat. I know you better than you think.”   
If he knew Mari at all she’d be standing firm with her hands placed firmly on her hips and that little adorable frown on her face. He risked a glance. Yep, he knew her alright.   
He heaved a sigh and tilted his head to the side and took her in. He didn’t know what it was. He was in love with Ladybug, that much was true. Anything and everything Ladybug did made him feel like she was the perfect girl for him. But somehow, Marinette had wormed her way under his skin and he found himself watching her.   
“…What?” she asked.   
He took a step towards her. “Look, princess…”  
Her hand landed on his chest and the connection to his mouth and brain temporarily snapped. Her hand was warm, really, really warm. Marinette stared at her hand as if it had come alive of its own accord.   
And just like her, his own hand slide from her elbow up to her hand. He squeezed her fingers lightly.   
Their eyes locked on their hands.   
She swallowed hard. “Chat…”  
“We both like other people, we shouldn’t.”  
She nodded her head agreeing. “It’s a bad idea. It’ll just make things confusing.”  
“Right…”  
They stood still her hand firmly gripped in his while her other hand lay on his chest doing its best to make his entire body fill with heat. “There’s just one problem,” he breathed studying the way her fingers curled around his.   
Her breath sounded a little bit like a rattle. “What’s that?”  
“I can’t seem to move away from you.”  
He broke away from their hands to look at her. Her blue, blue eyes caught his and he couldn’t look away from her. Marinette filled his vision and all he could see was this beautiful woman who had stayed up late into the night with him just to talk.   
“We shouldn’t,” she said.   
“We really shouldn’t” he agreed. His free hand hooked her wasted and gradually pulled her closer, asking instead of telling. She stepped into him and the space between them vanished. His heart caught between speeding along like a race horse or stopping all together. Chat couldn’t decide if it was painful or not.   
Mari’s breathing came a little quicker. She parted her lips to say something but he never got a chance to hear what she needed to say. She tasted like the cookies that she had just offered him. The heat that her hands had been trying to provide came flooding into him warming him too his toes. Their hands broke apart. She pulled him closer and he felt himself slowly drowning in the presence that was Marinette.   
She tilted her head and suddenly he was able to – 

Adrien jerked awake the feel of Marinette’s lips vibrating across his mouth. The hand that had been bathed in the silk of Marinette’s hair gripped his pillow tightly. He blinked hard. Again? No matter what he did he couldn’t forget that first kiss with Mari. Even though his heart belonged to Ladybug, he felt as if a piece had been chipped off with that kiss and now his heart no longer belonged solely to his Lady.   
His eyes burned with sleep deprivation. What time was it? The clock on his night stand beamed a bright 3:00am at him. He’d been asleep for all of two hours. It had taken them a while to track down the akuma and by the time Ladybug had cleaned up the mess and departed Adrien had felt like he’d been dragging his body home. Usually he’d had gone to chat with Mari. It was a habit he’d started to pick up. If it was later in the day, and the sun had gone down, he’d visit with her. Just to talk. It was nice to have someone that he could be 100% himself with and just…talk.   
Or at least mostly talk to. Sometimes they forgot they were supposed to be friends and that little flame of passion would remind them that there was something more and for just a little while, he’d forget that there were other things in the world, other problems that had to be dealt with.   
Adrien rolled over. What was Mari to him? Lately, he’d been dreaming about her a lot and frankly, he couldn’t decide if he should be annoyed or…  
Or what? He rolled over again waking Plagg.   
“Dude, what up?” the little Miraculous yawned. “Your face is super red.”  
Adrien felt the heat on his cheeks deepen and he buried his face in his pillow. “Shut up,” he groaned. The little miraculous yawned again and curled back up in his spot. He was too tried to deal with whatever was going on in that blond head.   
Eventually his lips stopped vibrating and he found sleep once again. Maybe tomorrow would be better. 

Ladybug flipped across the roof feeling it give way just as she went air born. This akuma had speed and power unlike anything they’d ever experienced. She didn’t even know where to look for the thing that had caused the transformation. She didn’t have time for that. And where was Chat Nior? There had been times when the other had been late but this amount of time was ridiculous.   
Ladybug flung her yoyo out to the side feeling the air of a fist just barely miss her ribs. She wouldn’t be able to keep this up forever. She didn’t even have enough time to ready her Lucky Charm before the akuma was on her once again.   
Time to regroup. She leapt away over the roofing keeping the akuma in sight before ducking behind a chimney. She flipped open her yoyo once again trying to reach Chat. Again there was no response. “Where are you Chat?”  
Darkness loomed above her threatening in its weight. She wasn’t fast enough. The blow sent a shockwave of rubble flying and a shard caught her ankle. She could feel the warm liquid dripping down around her foot. There was no time, the akuma would be too quick. It gave chase quickly closing the distance.   
Ladybug landed roughly. Her yoyo spun out to her intended target just as the magical string began to create a firm hold she felt it. Barely moving in time she felt the heavy blow slam into her side knocking her clear off course and straight through a building’s wall. 

Adrien darted around the corner doing his best to escape from the photoshoot. The setting sun gave the best light and his photographer demanded that now was the right time. He refused to take no for answer. He had to get to the akuma but his father’s secretary could sniff him out like a shark sniffing out blood. It was like she had a 6th sense or something.   
The form of Chat Noir settled around him and he was off to aid his Lady. From all the missed calls his staff alerted him too it wasn’t an average akuma. She needed help which felt rare for Ladybug, but anything for his lady. He made his way to the sound that seemed to dominate everything else in the atmosphere.   
He landed atop the roof gaining a better vantage spot and let his eyes search out the area of battle. The explosion near him showered him in debris. He coughed out the dust in his lungs before he finally found the source. What was that thing? The size of it felt odd. It didn’t look all the impressive but the feeling it gave off made it feel like a mountain had decided that you belong under it.   
He sprang into action just in time to see Ladybug slam through a wall and make a mess of the living room within.   
“Ladybug!”   
His staff twirled and he brought it down with a cry. The Akuma stepped to the side gripped his staff and sent him sailing through the air. He landed roughly barely managing to roll to his feet. He shook his head feeling dizzy from the amount of spinning he had just achieved.   
Ladybugs familiar battle cry sounded and the zip of her yoyo came nearer. She landed on her feet gracefully and stood over him.   
“You’re late, Chat.” Her frown made him feel like she would rather be kicking him.   
He stood then flashing a grin and giving his staff a flirty twirl. “I got a little held back but nothing can keep me away from you M’Lady.”  
She rolled her eyes. “Did you happen so see what could be akumatising him?”  
He shook his head and took a closer look at their enemy. “Why doesn’t he look like anything? He’s just kinda…there but he feels like a giant.”  
She nodded her head. “He’s been turning people colorless and they get depressed. He’s mostly like an animal so he hasn’t talked but I can’t see anything on him at all. He’s just a dark…thing.”  
“Here he comes!”  
Chat and Ladybug dove to opposites sides avoiding the strike that crushed the roof where they had been standing. It leapt towards Ladybug recognizing its previous target. While she distracted it Chat worked out the best place to ambush the creature trying to find the best hiding spot. He ran alongside the chase listening to Ladybug antagonize it further.   
He found his moment further ahead. A small gap between building would be perfect. He slid down between it using his feet to keep him elevated. He waited for the opportune moment Ladybug flashed by the opening. Chat extended his staff full speed feeling a satisfying jar as it impacted with something rather solid.   
He followed his staff and saw…nothing.   
“What the…”  
“Chat look out!”  
The blow came from below. The creature had smashed through the bottom of the building blowing its way through every floor until a rather large clawed hand slammed its heavy weight right into Chat’s chest. The air in his lungs retreated in fright leaving him behind gasping for air.   
Ladybug jumped to his side and gripped his hand. “No time to recover Chat we have to move.” She gave him a harsh tug and dragged him a long to what he hoped was a safe place.   
As soon as he could breathe again he spoke. “Did you see anything?”  
She shook her head fierce blue eyes scanning their hiding place. “I’m barely keeping my toes. It’s just so fast and it packs quite a punch.”  
Chat rubbed his chest knowing full well that if it weren’t for his miraculous his ribs would have been broken. “I’d say.”  
The wall behind them cracked.   
“Move!”  
Chat rolled to the side feeling a bit of a twinge scrape across his shoulder. A fist had punched its way through their cover. His head had been there. He felt the wound behind his shoulder and his hand came away red.   
“Chat! Move!”  
It proceeded like that for several exhausting minutes. The sun went down inviting in the rain that had been looming in the distance. There was only so long they could attack briefly before hiding. They were getting tired, running out of strength. Tired minds made mistakes. Ladybug tried again and again to use her lucky charm but before she could complete the phrase the creature would find them.   
“How is he finding us?” hissed Chat. Usually at this point in the fight he’d have been able to come up with varying puns that would have given Ladybug an adorable expression but mostly he was just distracted by the blood that had dripped into her eyes.   
She shook her head panting. What he thought was just a cut on her ankle looked more serious. He would have done something about it but now but how in the world was he supposed to help when they couldn’t get more than 10 seconds of breathing room.   
“I need to by you time,” he panted.   
She gripped his arm. “Don’t be an idiot. You can’t take that thing on all by yourself.”  
He placed his hand over hers. “We need your lucky charm if we’re going to save this guy. We can’t do anything if we use the time to use it to take a small rest. Let me distract him.”  
“Chat-“  
He interrupted her but erupting from their hiding place. He propelled himself towards the charging enemy, ignoring the sting of the rain on his face. With a spin he placed a well-timed kick right in the creatures face. He must have done something right because now the creature did its best to send him to kitty heaven.   
“Now would be a great time!”  
He barely managed to duck below a hit that might have seriously hurt him when he heard the words he’d been so desperate to hear. With Lucky charm activated they finally had a chance. Chat jumped over another swipe and landed. He backed away from the akuma using his staff to redirect what he couldn’t dodge. The rain came harder eliminating wherever dry spots he had left.   
And then it happened. He slipped. His foot found the one spot on the roof that had collected just enough water that when he stepped back to jump his foot slipped from under him placing him directly in the path of an oncoming strike.   
Razor sharp claws came for him parting the water before them. He brought his staff around to the front knowing he wouldn’t be fast enough to block the blow fully.   
Chat was right, he wasn’t fast enough. A full blown semi-truck hit him head on shooting him across the street and into the neighboring houses.   
It was official. Brick sucked. Why were houses made out of bricks anyway? With a heavy groan he picked himself up out of the chattered remains of a kitchen table and shook the glass from the TV out of his hair. He blinked hard doing his best to return the whole to one instead of three. A raging headache made his eyes feel like they had been turned into cheese graters.   
He staggered to the opening holding his head together. It would be alright now, he’d done his job, he’d gotten the akuma distracted long enough that Ladybug could use Lucky Charm. Resting a hand against the new window he’d made he saw Ladybug baring down on the akuma holding a small object in her hand she threw it and the black form of the akuma exploded outward opening up a small gab revealing a pencil. She reached inside gripping the pencil.   
It was like slow motion. Chat flung himself from the building ignoring the way his right side screamed at the movement. He dove for Ladybug screaming at her to just move. She had her hand on the pencil, pulling it out but it wouldn’t be in time. The claws bore down on her striking her square on her chest sending her slamming into the cement sidewalk below her.   
“No!”  
The pencil snapped and the black butterfly fluttered out. Chat speared it with his staff crushing it against the wall. He left his staff their running towards Ladybug. She gasped harshly, eyes wide as the pain exploded through her being.   
“Ladybug!” He had to get her out of there. He had to get her somewhere safe. Gathering her in his arms he sped off into the night.   
He didn’t get very far. Chat had to stop. His vision kept showing him more than one building and he couldn’t figure out which one to land on. Finally, he found small place on the side of a building. The balcony had a small cover that would keep them dry. His knees crumbled under him and he just barely managed to keep her from further injury. “Hang on Ladybug,”  
He struggled into the corner gripping Ladybug in his lap. Her miraculous had started to crumble. He could see parts of her blue jeans under the red and what looked like a pink shirt. He hoped it was pink. It was hard to tell past all of the blood. His hands pressed harshly against her chest doing their best to keep her life where it belonged. “Hang on,” he told her.   
Her blue eyes stared at him with a murky clarity that worried him.   
Her miraculous crumbled furthered shattering away in a red shine breaking off piece by piece. He’d never seen that before. As least when he had de-transformed that had never happened to him. His whole body shook with the stress of the situation but this was no time to panic.   
“Stay with me Ladybug, you have to stay awake.”  
She tried to say something to him but he spoke over her. “Save your strength, it’s going to be all right. I’ll get you someplace safe okay? I promise. You just have to stay awake.”  
He hated how scared he sounded. He needed to be the strong one right now. He needed to make her believe she’d be all right.   
Her eyes fluttered closed. “No you can’t do that. Stay awake Ladybug.”  
He gave her a small shake hating that it hurt her but he needed her to stay awake until he could get his strength back and get her to the hospital. But she didn’t wake up. He shook her again and her lack of response filled him with a terror he’d never felt before.   
“Ladybug?”  
Her mask crumbled away revealing that which he had always known beneath.   
Horror filled his chest crushing is heart in a vice.   
“Marinette?”


	2. Chapter 2

The entirety of Chat Noir’s world shattered into a billions shards and in his arms he held the remains. No, no, no, no! This couldn’t be real. Both of them? Both of the most important people in his life. Both of them. His mind cracked at the reality of the situation. The woman he was irrevocably in love with and the other who he had just began to fall for were both right here. Ladybug and Marinette. They were one and the same.   
How could he have been so stupid? How could he never notice? There had been so many signs right in front of him and he had never once tried to put them together. Ladybug was hurt, but so was Marinette. They were hurt. No, she was hurt. Everything he had ever fallen for had been wrapped up in one person. He’d fallen for the same person twice and now…now…  
His chest hurt and he couldn’t breathe. His mind zipped between one frantic thought and another.   
“Breathe,” a tiny voice told him. “Chat Noir just breathe.”  
“I can’t,” he gasped. His breath came faster and harsher until it felt as if he had no control. Everything slipped between his fingers and he struggled to hang on. How could this have happened? Why couldn’t he have been faster? Why wasn’t he better? The one time he needed to be the better hero and he couldn’t do it.   
“Chat breathe!” the little voice sounded so faint and tiny, weak even. “In and out. Deep as you can.”  
How was he supposed to breathe right now? Everything important had just combined into one thing and that one thing was going to die if he didn’t do something. His body trembled making it difficult for him to keep his hands on Marinette’s wound. The air around him began to close in intruding upon his thoughts slowly crushing him.  
“You’re having a panic attack, breath in as deep as you can.”  
Panic…attack? Is that what this was? His mind clawed deep into that one thought grasping onto the knowledge that he was having a panic attack and that if he could just figure out how to calm down he could get to work. With an incredible amount of willpower Chat forced himself to breathe in as deep as he could. Following the instruction of the tiny little voice he breathed out as slowly as he could manage. It felt as if ages had passed before the feeling of waking from a dream settled over him.   
“Good, good.”  
The little voice…  
Vibrant green eyes sought out the voice that was instrumental in helping him keep his sanity.   
The little Kwami was tiny, the same size as Plagg. She was red, or at least should have been. She looked awfully pale. She blinked at him and gave him a weak smile. “My names Tikki. I’m Marinette’s kwami.”   
He sucked in a shaky breath. “W-what do we do?” He couldn’t operate on all cylinders just yet. His crisis mode had been temporarily broken and he was finding it difficult to get it back on.   
“I need to eat something; I can’t transform Marinette if I’m this week. If she can transform and use Miraculous Ladybug and heal.”  
Slowly his brain started working again. “I haven’t used Cataclysm yet. I can send Plagg to get you food.”  
Tikki slowly made her way to Marinette. “But what about you, you’re hurt too.”  
He blinked at her. What? He didn’t feel hurt. Sure he’d been thrown through a wall but he wasn’t hurt like Mari was.   
“Chat you’re bleeding, if you revert now you might die yourself. You can’t even move.”  
He shook his head. “That doesn’t matter right now. As long as we can get you fed and Mari comes back around and she uses Miraculous Ladybug all of our injuries will leave. I have no other choice right now. This is the best shot we have.”  
Her eyes looked sad but she nodded her head.   
Usually when he reverted it went fairly fast. This time it was slow, like it was reluctant to go.  
Plagg appeared into view and words flew out of his mouth in a wide range of fury that Adrien had never seen before.   
“You idiot! You should have stayed as Chat Noir, you would have healed and been able to get Mari to a safe place and now you aren’t healing anymore!”  
Adrien gave him a tired smiled doing his best to ignore the burning pain that lanced through his side. The way it hurt to breathe told him he’d cracked a rip or two. “I get that Plagg, but she won’t heal unless she calls out to Tikki. You need to find food for her, and something for Mari. My shirt’s not going to be enough.” He shrugged out of his white button up shirt and ripped it into shreds highly conscious of the increase of blood flow. What if she really did die? What was he going to tell her parents? What was he going to tell Alya? What was he going to tell everyone about Ladybug? He turned his thoughts away to the task at hand. If he focused too much on the what if’s, then he could feel it, right there, waiting to take him and throw him into a panic so deep he worried he’d never get out.   
Focus. Deal with now.   
He did the best he could. Ladybug was always better at this part. But then again, they never had to worry that much. Miraculous Ladybug had the power to clean up any and all damage that happened during the akuma’s rampage, including them.   
Adrien did his best to make her comfortable. Worry had settled in his stomach with such a deep cold weight he felt that he might be sick at times. What was he going to do? He has underestimated the state of his injury. He’d done his best to patch himself up but he couldn’t quite reach it. His injury must have happened after he’d been thrown through the wall. He’d thought the dizziness was from the earlier panic attack but now he realized he’d bleed far too much.   
The best he could do was wait for Plagg to return and stay conscious. Tikki proved to be a great help in that. Every time he felt the need to close his eyes she’d make sure he answered his question. At first it had been simple things. She’d asked what his favorite color was, following it up with food, and his favorite season. Then the questions got harder forcing him to think about it. When his mind had difficulty answering she switched it up and got personal. Tikki asked him about the day he became Chat Noir. That he could answer. It had been amazing. He’d experience a freedom he’d feared he would never have. He’d met a girl he never thought existed and from that day forward his life improved. But only in some ways. His regular life held hardships that he didn’t know how to handle alone but who was going to understand him? The superhero life was easier, more enjoyable. He got to villains and save people. He was able to do all that while the girl he was in love with fought by his side.   
“Adrien…Adrien!”  
Adrien jerked awake feeing his heart beat frantically at the knowledge that he’d almost made himself horribly vulnerable. If he didn’t stay conscious who was going to take care of Mari?   
Tikki collapsed against Mari’s forehead breathing a sigh of relief.   
“How long was I out?”  
“Long enough that it scared me.” Tikki shuddered. “Where is Plagg? He’s been gone for a while.”  
Adrien shook his head and did his best to sit up straighter to fight off the exhaustion. He glanced at the sky. The rain had lost its intensity but it continued to fall with no sign of letting up. He shivered in the cold of it. Great. If he didn’t die from the blood loss it would be the pneumonia that got him.   
“I’m sure he’ll be back soon.” He’d better be. Mari had gotten paler but there’s was nothing else he could do. If he had the energy he would have punched something. If he hadn’t been concussed than maybe he could have gotten them to a hospital instead of getting them stranded where no one could see them.   
“Tell me about your Mom,” Tikki said suddenly.   
Adrien froze feeling the familiar stab in his heart. His mother? Why? He didn’t want to talk about her. It still hurt too much.   
“Why?” The words came out harsher than he had intended.   
She gave him a small smile. “You don’t have to. Me and Mari have always wondered what she was like. When she wakes up I’d like to tell her.”  
“You can’t.”  
Tikki looked at him surprised. “Why not? You’ve wanted to know who she is for so long why would you hid yourself?”  
He blinked hard to clear his vision and thoughts. “Because I promised her. When she was ready she could tell me herself I don’t want to throw this on her. Last time we were close to seeing one another she wasn’t ready. I can’t take that away from her.”   
They talked about the future then. What would he do now? He knew about Ladybugs secret identity. What was he going to do about it? He wasn’t sure. When he came to that cross road he’d figure it out. For now, he had to focus on the immediate problem. Mari’s breathing had gotten shorter, quicker. It hurt worse than he thought it would to hear her struggle. His whole world, right there, about to slip out of his grasp.   
“Come on Plagg,” he muttered. He didn’t know how much longer he could hold on. The next time he fell unconscious he was sure that he wasn’t going to come out of it. He hadn’t been able to see well for a long time now. He’d kept up pretenses for Tikki. He didn’t want her to worry any more than she was. He fought for what felt like hours.   
The blackness around his vision that had been slowly closing in around him came at him with a weight he hadn’t felt before. His world tilted and spun. His body felt the weight of darkness pull him down until the rough feel of the wall behind him became nothing more than emptiness.   
“Adrein!”  
Plagg?  
His hand struggled to raise. He reached out towards his little friend and with a desperation spurred by his need to survive, he called out to him. The darkness clouded over him leaving him with the after image of his suit flowing up his arm. 

Hiding as high up as they were had not been a smart move. He had to get to them fast before someone else found them or his chance would be ruined. The rain had made his old bones stiff during the walk through the streets but he needed to get to Chat Noir and Ladybug before it was too late. According to the news he received, there was barely any time at all.   
Soaking hair dripping access liquid down his shirt he finally made it to the children just in time to see the suit of Chat Noir settle over him. The sight filled him with a feeling he had not felt in many years. The boy had done the best he could but without extensive healing knowledge the effort would never be enough. With his Kwami possessing his ring he would start to heal.   
He crouched down to inspect the wounds closer. What appeared to be claw marks had cut deep scratching across the girl’s sternum. If he wasn’t fast enough she would die soon. The boy looked to be no better, the gash in his side was no more a cut as it was a hole.   
He’d have to work quickly and carefully. 

Mari woke with a gasp shuddering as the very clear memory of razor sharp claws shredded through her with ease. She wanted to sit up. Laying here made her feel so vulnerable. She sat up feeling a painful pull in her chest that made her breathe struggle from her lungs.   
“Tikki?”  
The little Kwami fluttered into view holding the item she used to defeat the akuma. It looked like a super charged New Year’s popper. Or what was left of it. She hadn’t realized it had been covered in a protected out armor until she had used her Lucky Charm.   
“You’re awake!” Tikki said cheerfully. “We were really worried about you.”  
“We.”  
Tikki nodded and directed her to the sleeping form next to her.   
Chat’s pale face jarred her to her core. He lay on his side his usually shinny blond hair drooped against his face. His breath came shallow and harsh. A very large bandage covered his side with a dark red stain in the middle. Her own bandages were dark but…  
She reached a shaky hand forward and touched his face. “Is…is he going to be alright?”  
“He’s lost far too much blood.”  
Marinette’s head jerked towards the noise. Her eyes widen in surprise. “Master Fu?” With a glance at her surrounding she realized he had brought them back to his place. The place where he had first introduced a whole new world to her.   
He nodded his head from his spot on the floor. He looked exhausted. Heavy bags rested under his blood shot eyes. “You two gave it your best shot but I didn’t think dying would be such a great idea. I’m surprised you woke first. You are far more injured than he is.”  
She almost died? Chat almost died?  
The tremor in her hand increased until she stuffed it under her leg. Chat almost died. The knowledge of that hurt with such an ache that for a moment she couldn’t breathe. He’d almost died. Not only had one of her best friends been hurt, but the person she had gradually fallen in love with to the point that it was confusing had been hurt.   
She loved Adrien. That much was true. But Chat…He’d kissed her and just like they had said, it would get confusing. It was confusing. How could she love two people this much?   
She placed her hand on his face again. “I’m sorry Chat.” A tear escaped as she thought of a world without her partner. A world without him was a dead world. He brought so much color to her life. Without him she would never have become Ladybug. She need him. The fact that he was this hurt filled her with such pain she forgot about the fact that her own chest should have hurt more. What was she going to do?   
“That would help,” Master Fu said.   
She looked at him quizzically. He pointed to the object that Tikki held. “You’ll need to transform, but Miraculous Ladybug will be better medicine for Chat Noir than anything I could do.”  
He was right. How could she have been so stupid? All of Chat’s pain could go away. All of his suffering could end all she needed to do was use Miraculous Ladybug.   
“Tikki, spots on.”  
With it’s usually grace and speed the suit of her alter ego flowed over her. With the protection of the Miraculous covering her skin she suddenly felt like she could breathe again. She called out the words she knew well and watched as the object given to her by lucky charm turned into the energy that erased everything that happened since the creation of the akuma.   
Finally, the energy settle over her and Chat and the pain within her melted away. Her yoyo returned she waiting for Chat to move. He had been healed now. Everything would be alright. It had to be.   
She waited with bated breath.   
With a tiny groan Chat’s vibrant green eyes opened with a blurry clarity that made her think for a brief moment that her powers hadn’t worked and he was still hurt.   
“Ladybug?”   
She crashed into him wrapping her arms around him holding him to her the sickening feeling of worry leave her chest. “You scared me you stupid cat.” She buried her face against him hiding the tears of her relief. She could have lost him but now here he was warm and reassuring just like he always was.   
His arms came around her circling her waste. He held her against him like he was afraid that if he let go something would happen. “Like wise M’Lady,” he mumbled. “You really scared me.” His head nestled against her shoulder and he breathed in her smell. They held each other for a long moment.   
A beep rang out into the silence causing Ladybug to pull away from Chat.   
Tired green eyes stared into wet blue ones. “Do you really have to go?” Chat asked.   
The way he said it differed from all the other times he had asked her. All the urging that he had put into it before was gone and now, it sounded like he really did just want her to stay. He didn’t care about her identity this time. He just needed her to stay.   
She smiled warmly at him. “I would kitty, but-“  
Master Fu interrupted her. “Unfortunately, if Ladybug does not leave soon those who know her will begin to wonder where she is at.”   
She nodded her agreement. Already the sun had made its high enough in the sky that her Dad would be walking up the stairs any minute to wake her for Saturday morning breakfast. He looked at the ground disappointment before he reached for her hand. “I understand M’Lady but next time…next time.” His eyes were fierce when they bore into her. “Promise you will be careful. I can’t do that again.”  
She squeezed his fingers. “I promise.”  
“Good.”


	3. Chapter 3

Marinette stared at the new scars that racked across her chest. Miraculous Ladybug repaired the damage from any akuma, it didn’t revert it. As she studied the ragged edges and felt the small pump on her sternum she found herself acutely away of how close she came to dying. Not for the first time she found herself glad that her favorite shirt went high enough to cover the evidence of her superhero life. It had been two weeks since the incident and yet she couldn’t quite get used to the scars. She finished changing before heading down to the kitchen and snatching a piece of toast off the counter. She kissed her mom on the cheek and darted out the door. One of these days she’d learn what the phrase “on time” meant.   
As always, she bolted in the class room door just before the final bell. Feeling embarrassed at the way she’d almost fallen she quickly sat herself down next to Alya. Adrien talked animatedly with Nino in front of her. He caught her staring and smiled at her sending her face exploding in red.   
Even after she’d almost died life never seemed to change.   
The teacher opened her book and the day began as it always did. 

Adrien fidgeted in his seat. He’d never been so aware of Marinette’s presence before. It was still such a shocking thing for him. Both woman, who’d he’d fallen in love with happened to be the same exact person. How was he supposed to wrap his mind around that? Not only that, his heart hurt. Confusion plagued him to the point he found sleep almost impossible. His exhaustion made him clumsy when he had to fight akuma and his studies had even begun to suffer for it. A yawn slip is face so wide tears picked the corners of his eyes.   
What was he going to do? Ladybug was Marinette, his princess was Ladybug. His lady was Marinette. Again, that all too familiar vice gripped his stomach. No matter his advances, Ladybug showed no interests in him, not even a flicker of a smile when he made a pun. But Marinette. She thought he was funny, Marinette liked him, even kissed him. So why? Why couldn’t she behave the same no matter who she was? She accepted him as Marinette but as Ladybug? His brain spun with the weirdness of it all and he had to place his head in his hands and breathe. Both of his lives just collided a little too harshly for the moment.   
“Adrien,” hiss Nino. He elbowed his friend in his side jerking Adrien out of his thoughts.   
Adrien jumped up right eyes shooting towards the teacher. “Are you feeling well Mr. Agreste?”  
He nodded vigorously. “Yes ma’am. Just didn’t sleep very well is all.”   
The teacher nodded her head as if his answer was enough and continued the lesson. Marinette’s concerned whisper reached his ears and he couldn’t help the longing in his heart. He wanted to tell her. Show her that he was Chat Noir. In these two week’s he’d become increasingly aware that he’d been an idiot. Marinette had developed quite the crush on him and he’d been to oblivious to see it. She he was the other guy that she had talked about.   
His eye twitched. Marinette was in love with both Chat Noir and Adrien Agreste and he just happened to be both of those people. He himself was in love with Marinette and Ladybug and they were both the same people. In the beginning, he thought that Mari liked Chat Noir and not Adrien. Now he finds out it both. He could have groaned in frustration. There was a four way thing going on here and it just so happened they were both in love with each other.   
How the hell was he supposed to even act around her now? The frustration mounted within him. What was he going to do? He’d made Tikki promise not to tell her anything. She’d reveal herself to him when she was ready but what if that time never came? What if she was forever afraid to tell reveal her identity? He wouldn’t be able to keep this secret from her forever. It was too big for him. Already he felt at the end of his rope. His interaction with Marinette had gone from awkward to downright flirty. It took an incredible amount of concentration to keep from slipping up and accidentally calling Mari, Princess.   
He folded his arms and dug his nails into his skin. The burning desire to see and been plaguing him as well. That that he knew he wanted to be with her all the time. He wanted to fight alongside Ladybug but he wanted to spend his waking moment with Mari by his side just talking about random stupid things that would make her laugh until she held her stomach in pain.   
He’d been to her house twice since they’d almost died and he’d never had that big of an absence. It already been 4 days since the last visit and he was positive he wouldn’t be able to stay away any longer. He needed her.   
He paused. There was a thought. He’d always counted Mari as a friend, someone to talk to but he’d never felt like he needed her and now, he realized that without her, he wouldn’t have gotten through some pretty rough things in his life. Nino may have been his best friend but he would never understand him like Mari did.   
The class ended and Adrien realized that he had once again been too absorbed in his own thoughts to pay attention. Gathering his bag, he followed Nino to the front doors of the school.   
“Chamomile.”  
Adrien looked up from his shoes and found the voice.   
“What?”  
Marinette gave him a small little smile and glanced to the side. She brushed a stray hair behind her ear in a movement he’d come to find stupidly attractive. “Chamomile tea,” she said again. “It’ll help you sleep.”  
Why was she so cute? The way she shyly looked up at him made his hand itch with the need to cup her cheek and turn her towards him. His heart beat decided now would be a great time to remind him just how much he liked her.   
“Thanks, I’ll have to have some tonight.”  
Her smiled widened a little bit giving him a shot of an adorable dimply. He sucked in a breath to keep from doing something stupid. Even so his hand still reached out for her own and he kissed it. He did it purely to see her cheeks redden further. It was a habit he could never break. Teasing her in that subtle way was something he enjoyed doing. He was such an idiot.   
He left her there with a wave and a giggle Alya by her side.   
Nino raised a brow at him.   
“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were in to Marinette.”  
Fighting off the blush that started in his chest proved harder than he thought it would. 

Chat crouched on the balcony he’d come to know well and tapped a finger on his chin. Should he knock? Or should he just hop in like he always did and earn himself a surprised squeal? Nerves force him to stand and pace along the railing back and forth fingers gripping his chin as he thought of the best way to approach her. He hadn’t been here in forever…well only four days but still. It was Mari and he just…  
His mind flashed back to the last kiss he had shared with him and he buried his face in his hands feeling the heat burn through his mask. He was so hopeless. Plagg was right. He was a romantic sap.   
He resumed his pacing shaking his arms to work up courage that he had somehow lost. He was Chat Noir; he didn’t do shy. He was brash, quippy, and oh so very…punny. He paused at his pun. He’d lost his nack! As puns went that had to be his worst one.   
His hands vigorously ruffled his hair and he took to deep breath before hoping off the railing and marching to the door. He reached to knock before his nerves sent him sailing back to his railing and gripping his ears in frustration.   
“Stop being such a wuss,” he growled at himself.   
He stood up strait, puffed his chest out and forced firm sure steps over to the door and gave it a firm knock. All confidence left him. It was too late now; she’d know he was here. He waited with a baited breath. After a few moments, he cocked an ear to the glass.   
“Princess?” he called quietly. The lack of response sent is curiosity zipping through him. He opened the window and pocked a head through the opening. He looked around him see the darkness all around.   
“Princess?” he called again.   
The small laughter rising from the closed trap door let him know that she was still at dinner with her parents. Dinner with her parents. He’d been so excited to see her he forgot to check the time. He never came this early. With a small grunt of disappointment, he plopped down on to her bed and flicked on the lamp on her night stand.   
He cocked a head to the side. It looked like she had started a new book. 

He wasn’t how sure how long it was until the trap door opened. “Why does he keep trying so hard? She’s obviously not interested.”  
An adorable surprised squeal was his reply. “Chat! How many times have I told you? Don’t do that!”   
He chuckled. “It never gets old, Princess.” He placed the book on his chest an looked at her upside down.   
She huffed at him before making the climb up to her bed. He made room from her by rolling from his back to his stomach. Mari settled next to him folding her legs and plucking her book from where it had fallen. “How long have you been here? You got pretty far.”  
He shrugged. “But seriously, she’s the worst person for him so why does he keep trying.”  
She shook her head and smiled a smile that made his chest ache. “If you had kept reading you would know,”  
He pouted at her, “Why can’t you just tell me?”  
“That’s not how books work,” she replied giving his nose a poke.   
He swatted at her hand before resuming his position on his back. He grumbled. “I just wanna know…”  
She laughed softly before she opened the book and began to read where he had left off.   
Things were so easy with her. He’d been so nervous when he had fist come and now here he was trading banter and theories about a book he couldn’t remember the name of. Eventually, she used his stomach as a pillow while she read. His fingers absently played with her hair as he listened. She read long into the night. Long enough that he fell asleep listening to her voice and feeling a sense of comfort and content he hadn’t felt in a while. The book found it’s resting place against her chest as the mumbled words of a garbled sentence tried to find their way out of a sleeping mind.


	4. Chapter 4

A sharp elbow forced Chat awake so he could accommodate the sleeping form next to him. She sighed as their bodies fit together like a puzzle piece. He readjusted his arm and wrapped it around her before letting himself slide back into that comfortable warmth. Chat was just about to drift off into that floating dream when he suddenly found himself slammed back into his body.   
Why was he still _here?_ His eyes snapped open and sought the clock that rested on the night stand. 4:47 AM shown out at him. He’d been asleep for nearly 3 hours. He did a quick mental check and relaxed minimally when he realized no one would be looking for him for another hour and a half at least.   
Another question came to mind. Why was he still Chat? If he didn’t use any of his powers, the transformation must last a lot longer. Good to know. Now came the next part. How in the world was he going to get out of bed without waking up Marinette?   
This brought about the next problem. He really didn’t want to get up. He wanted to stay there forever with her next to his side sharing their warmth. He wanted to watch the way her hand rested next to her mouth fingers slightly curled. He wanted to feel her snuggle into him and hear her breathing. Chat didn’t want to go home to his cold bed. He didn’t want to go home and be alone.   
But he had to. Tomorrow, or today, was Friday. He had to get home in time for Nathalie to wake him for breakfast and let him know what his schedule was for the day. He also had to be there for her to tell him that once again his Father would not be joining him. Tomorrow night would be better. He wouldn’t have to leave.   
His thoughts screeched to a halt. Just because he accidentally slept over did not mean he could do it again. It was purely an accident. He should have been the gentleman and left when she fell asleep. Wait. He’d fallen asleep first. Why didn’t she wake him? Did she fall asleep too?   
The tiny thought filled him with enough emotion his face flushed red. He felt so stupid but it still made him happy anyways. No matter how confusing the situation was, part of Ladybug really did enjoy his presence. Now if only he could get the awesome, heroic part to like him just as much as the shy, adorable, clumsy part.   
He glanced at the clock again and noticed that he’d managed to stretch the time for another half hour. He really did need to go. Plagg would need to recharge. Even if the transformation lasted longer with no use of powers it would still drain the little guy. Time to go. He’d have just enough time to swing into his open window and dive into the shower before Nathalie came to get him out of bed.   
Slowly, and with a patience that he didn’t know he had he removed himself from under Marinette and made his leave. He left a note for her so she wouldn’t feel too abandoned. He would have woken her up to say goodbye but she had an hour before her alarm would go off and he didn’t want to ruin that. Besides, she was just so…perfect.   
Chat made his way home noticing the sun starting to light up the far sky before it would make its appearance. The world started to wake as he went by and the birds decided that making some noise would be a great idea. Just like he thought he made it through his window and landed just as there was a knock on his door.   
“Adrien, you better not have slept through your alarm again. It’s time for breakfast.”  
“N-no,” he replied “Just getting into the shower.”  
“You’ll have to be quick. You don’t have much time.”  
“I’ll be right down!”   
Chat listened to her retreating footsteps before collapsing against his doorway. He’d gotten so little sleep in the past few days and he knew it was going to start hurting his studies if he didn’t get on it. Time for that later. Now it was time to feed Plagg and Shower. 

“So,” Chat panted, “any ideas?”  
Ladybugs eyes darted around like they did when she did her best to come up with a plan. “Give me a second.” He watched as her bottom lip took on a slight pout. He did his best not to stare. After they had both almost died it seemed they took battles on a whole new level of serious. He joked less, she didn’t speak as much. They fought harder than they ever had determined to take the enemy down as fast as they could with little trouble.   
A roaring smash sent dust and debris raining down on them. “Any time now M’Lady.”   
She sighed in frustration. No other choice. Grabbing Chat’s hand, she started out into the street making sure to grab the akuma’s attention. She threw here yoyo high into the air using her final power and when a belt landed in her hands they were both equally confused.   
“And that’s going to be helpful how?”  
“Um…”  
With a scrape and a roar that vibrated the bones with in them the creature lunged at them. For such a big thing, it was quick. It wasn’t as quick as the akuma that had nearly killed them but that didn’t mean they could lose focus. Chat dove in and did his best to distract it. He offered quips here and there to make sure it stayed angry with him while Ladybug used whatever vision she had to figure out what the heck she was supposed to use a belt for.   
Not for the first time he found himself immensely glad for his fencing classes. Everything came easier and faster as Chat Noir but without the knowledge and muscle memory already there, Chat felt sure that he would have been seriously hurt long before this. He dove between the legs of his attach feeling the street crumple where he had been just a moment before. I sprang to his feet on the other side just in time for Ladybug to connect the akuma’s right foot to his left hand. With a crash, it fell to the ground and the small piece of paper hidden inside the folds of fur was ripped to shreds.   
Butterfly returned to pure white Chat heaved a sigh of relief.   
“Pound it!”  
Chat’s bright grin disappeared in a flash as the news swarmed them like a hoard of angry bees. Questions flew at them as if they were being pelted by tiny rocks. The cameras flashed about them making his eyes blur. He covered his eyes trying to remove the giant white spots obstructing his vision.   
A familiar beep came to his attention. Ladybug, usually quick with her words, found herself unable to extract herself from the reporters. They were like animals. With a struggle that Chat would never admit he worked his way through the hordes of people he’d never seen before towards his partner in justice and gripped her hand.   
He slammed his staff down with enough force that the ringing clang drew all attention towards them. “If you’ll excuse us ladies and gentlemen M’Lady and I have a prior engagement to keep. He extended his staff upwards landing them gently on the above roof.   
“Chat Noir! Ladybug! I have a few questions.”  
They two super heroes stared at the new reporters with shock. “Has there always been this many news stations?” Chat asked.   
“Have they ever cared this much?” The dots on Ladybugs earrings faded further. “At this rate I’ll never get away.”  
“Come with me Ladybug, I’ll find a place to hid.” He took her hand again and dove in through the open skylight. With a quick flick of her wrist Ladybug swung them towards a nearby railing. The door to the ground floor smashed open.   
“It’s like they’re a pack of wolves. When did they get so creepy?” Chat shuddered remember a time when he was younger and they hadn’t left him alone until his father had threaten to get them all fired.   
Ladybug ran next to him searching for an open door they could dart into. “We were in a crowded place. We can usual clear out any civilians but this time we didn’t have any time.”  
“Whatever the reason these guys are crazy today.”  
Voices down the hall made them freeze. “Uh-oh,” Chat whispered. Searching with quick eyes he found a maintenance closet. Forcing the door, he broke the latch and dragged Ladybug inside just as the new reporters rounded the corner. He placed a trained ear against the wood waiting for the footsteps to recede.   
“Well I guess this place is just as good.” The hum of familiar magic brushed over his skin and he knew that if he turned he would see Marinette.   
“Ladybug?”  
“I…”   
“Did you change back?”  
Her silence answered him. He was reminded of a moment like this before. Ladybug I dove into a closet just before she transformed leaving the door slightly ajar. It had taken incredible will power to close it the rest of the way instead of opening it and finally learning.   
“Chat…Chat I want…”  
His heart leapt in his chest. He kept a firm gaze on the door. She wanted to tell him? That was it wasn’t it. Oh, please for the love of God let this be it. He didn’t want up his charade of not knowing any longer. It was all he could do to keep from showing every ounce of affection he had for her when he wasn’t playing the Cat hero. She wanted him to know so badly.   
After several agonizing moments, she spoke again. “T-turn around.”  
He turned slowly knowing that if he went to fast she’d panic like a frightened animal.   
“With your eyes closed!” she blurted. Stress soaked her voice making Chat be sure that his eyes were firmly screwed shut. Finally, he faced her, or what he hoped was her.   
She stood before him feeling incredibly naked. It was as if she were about to bare he soul. Would he be okay with it? As Marinette she had welcomed everything Chat was. He was funny and cute and so incredibly kind. But as Ladybug she had always pushed him away. She pushed him away because what if he saw? What if he found out that she wasn’t Ladybug? Ladybug was just an alter ego she could never be. She knew that Chat was in love with Ladybug but could he love her? Could he love her after all the time she spend pushing him away? After all of the lies? Her chest felt like it was going to explode. Was she breathing? Did she forget to breathe?   
When he met only quiet he dared speak. “M- Ladybug?” he said barely catching himself.   
Say something. Do something. Anything! Her eyes felt hot with the burn of threatening tears.   
Suddenly her broken voice slammed into Chat’s heart rending it asunder.   
“I can’t do it,” she barreled into him arms reaching around fingers digging into his suit while her face buried its way into his chest.   
Had he been ready for it he may have been able to keep them standing. His back slammed into the wall and slowly he let himself slide to the ground. He wrapped his arms around her giving holder her tight against him. It hurt to hear her struggle. The smell of her tears filled the air and he felt his heart crack with hers.   
“I’m so sorry, Chat. I want you to know but…but-”  
“It’s alright,” he said stroking her hair. “My eyes are closed I didn’t see anything. You’re not ready.”   
She shook against him bitter tears escaping her eyes unable to handle the warring feelings of overwhelming relief and crushing regret. She wanted him to know. She didn’t want to hide who she was anymore. She loved him. She loved him so much it hurt and she lived for the nights when he came to visit and spend hours talking with him. She wanted to be herself around him. She was too much of a damn coward.   
Chat wasn’t sure how long they stayed there. He waited until she had managed to calm herself enough that her sobs were no longer breaking her body apart. He waited until her breathe came evenly. He hated what would have to come next. She wasn’t ready and would need to feed her kwami. To do so would mean he would have to leave her. The very idea of it made him so frustrated he wanted to lash out at something. Even so, he’d only leave when she asked him too not a moment before.   
Eventually he noticed the deep even tones of her breathe and dared a peak. She’d cried herself into exhaustion. For some reason, it made it all the harder. He didn’t want to wake her up but Tikki would need the energy.   
The small little kwami came out of hiding then and situated herself on Chat’s shoulder. “She tried to tell you before. This is the first time she’s come so close.”   
Chat looked at her with a strange mixture of tenderness and sorrow. She was so scared to reveal herself. What did she think would happen? He wanted to kiss her again. That was for sure. But he also wanted to be fully honest with her. But he knew too much about her. It felt wrong to be the one to reveal himself first. Doing so would feel like he stole her courage. He wanted her to do it on her own not in a response to something he did.   
“What do I do?”   
Tikki sighed. “Be patient for a while longer. I’ll help her work up the courage.”   
Chat started at that. “You will?”  
She nodded with determination. “She loves you, but she’s too afraid you won’t accept both parts of her.”  
Chat leaned his head back against the wall running his fingers through Mari’s black silky locks. “If only she knew.”


	5. Chapter 5

Marinette scribbled furiously in her diary frustrated by the fact that she couldn’t talk to anyone except for Tikki. She needed Alya but she couldn’t tell her. She wrote her hearts desires spilling it all the page in harsh writing that would rip the paper if she didn’t calm down. She tried so hard today. She was there before him and the utter terror of it all had robbed her of her will.   
“Bad day?”  
Marinette slammed her diary closed so fast she almost smashed her fingers. “H-hello Chat.”  
She looked up to see him perched on the railing of her loft. His head cocked to the side adorably.   
“Okay really bad day. You didn’t yell at me for scaring you.” He pouted as if disappointed.   
She gave him a small frown and locked her diary in its spot before climbing up to her bed. She climbed onto her bed and grabbed a pillow hugging it to her.   
Chat dropped from his perch standing before her worry beginning to show on his face. “Do you wanna talk about it?”  
Marinette sighed and rested her chin on the pillow. “No…yes…maybe.” Her face buried its way in the soft fabric. “I don’t know.”  
Chat came closer sitting on the bed across from her. “Think I can help?”  
She peered at him. “I tried to do it today.”  
“Do what?”  
“I tried to tell him the truth and I chicken out like a loser.” She hated the pain that sprang up in her chest. Why did she feel so guilty? Why did it make her so sad to know that her inability would disappoint him? She glanced at Chat hating and both love that she could talk to him. It felt strange. Here she was, her true self right in front of the boy she loved about to spill how she couldn’t admit the truth to him. But at the same time, Chat would have no idea that she was talking about him.  
Chat felt a bubble of excitement climbing up his stomach and settling in his heart. It had to be when they were in the closet right? Right? He didn’t remember any time before then during school when Marinette had gotten more flustered than usual.  
“What were you going to tell him?”  
She stiffened slightly. “The truth, the truth about me, who I am.”  
“You’re not a super villain, are you?”  
She smiled a tiny smile. Chat always did his best to cheer her up but she felt too…broken for any of his attempts to work.   
He wanted to just hold her. He hated the expression on her face. If he had a way to pick up the broken pieces of her heart and put them back together, he would. But what was he supposed to do? He couldn’t just blurt out that it was him. He mentally shook himself. His situation just became increasingly frustrating. It was him she was in love with. Both sides of him and here he was pretending that he didn’t know anything. Frustration. He hated how familiar he was with it.   
Marinette scooted over to his side and leaned a shoulder   
“Why is it so hard to tell him?” She felt as if a heavy weight, heavier than any she had ever know had settle down on her shoulders.   
She whispered it so quietly Chat wasn’t sure if he was supposed to hear. He stayed quiet, fingers playing with the ribbon tied in her hair. He liked her weight against him. It felt reassuring.   
Mari leaned harder against him settling into his warmth. Enjoying the feel of his arm across her back. She couldn’t fully relax. What if she could never tell him? What if Chat never learned who Ladybug was? What if he never learned that the girl he admired was sitting next to him doing her best to keep from folding into a small timid ball.   
“Do you think it’s because I’m scared?” she asked him.   
Chat rested his chin atop her head. “Scared of what, Princess?”   
She sighed heavily, put her pillow down and did her best to turn and face him. “I think, no I know I am scared to how him who I am.”  
He blinked at her. She said it so matter of fact but he knew there was more to it than that. “Anyone would be scared to let all of their walls down.”   
The look she gave him confirmed his theory. The reveal may have been the surface problem but it was the underlying reasons to why it was so hard that she really struggled with.   
“What if, the girl you like only likes one version of you. What if you show her who you really are on the inside and she doesn’t like that you? What if she can’t accept you?”  
He thought for a moment. “It’s more the other way around for me. Here and now, I’m completely myself. But who I have to be out there, that’s not the real me. This is.”   
It wasn’t want she wanted and he could tell by the way she drew away from him and say across from him. He hated the absence of her weight against his side. It felt as if part of him considered floating away into space.   
“Hypothetically speaking, say I have an alter ego. She’s strong, bad ass, girl with a plan always takes down the enemies, does the right thing no matter what is a super hero,” she coughed through her mistake, “kind of girl.” Damn, even with him sitting here she could talk to him about her problem but she couldn’t give him any specifics. “She’s brave, she’s smart, and always knows exactly what to do. But then there’s me. I’m too timid for my own good, I can’t even wake up in the morning without causing some sort of disaster. I’m so clumsy the fact I have a room up here should make people question my parent’s ability to raise me. I’m so useless it’s embarrassing. I know there are things I’m good at. I’m a great designer, I can stick up for my friends, but when it comes to being like my alter ego…I’m not her.”   
Chat stared at Marinette as if some stranger had taken her place. The Mari he knew had a kindness he hoped to match one day, a gentleness that seemed to go beyond normal, and she had a confidence that he had secretly admired. She knew who she was. Or at least that’s how he’d always seen her.   
“Is that what you think of yourself? You have got to listen to your friends more, Princess, you are who your ‘alter ego’ is and more. Have a little more faith in yourself. You’re Marinette, fashion designer extraordinaire, defender of the weak, and fearless friend. If it makes you feel any better, I like this version of you, you and all your little quirks and weirdness.”  
She sniffled and he felt a sting of panic. Had he made her cry?  
His words fluttered around her. For now, she’d grab hold of them and keep them close to her heart. She would hold them as truth. Chat could say he liked her, and she knew he did. Why else would he come to talk with her for hours almost every night? Why else would he have kissed her? Even so a small part of her insisted that he didn’t love her. He loved Ladybug and she couldn’t be Ladybug. She was only Marinette.   
His hands suddenly reached out and gripped her cheeks forcing her to look at him. “I mean it,” he said, green eyes piecing her. “I really do like you.”  
How could he always be so kind? How could he always know the right thing to say to make her doubts silent. What was he so…perfect?  
“Do you understand me Mari?” he asked as the tears welled up within her. “Who you are is very precious to me.”   
Before he could do anything more she reached forward arms circling his neck. She moved forward and kissed him pulling him close replacing the space between them with nothing. She loved him. She loved him so much.   
Chat, startled by her movement, found himself frozen in place arms still outstretched where they had been holding her just a moment before. Gradually the heat the spread from her lips spread through him thawing his limbs until he found himself melting into her embrace. He gripped her close understanding the intensity in which she moved against him. The last of her lips sent an ache through his jaw. He could survive on that taste alone. His heart ached with the need to be exposed to her, owned by her.   
She needed to be close to him. She wanted the feel of his hands in her hair and the strength of his arms chase away her fears. She wanted him to be all that she needed and she hated the fear that kept her from him. But right here, in the moment. She allowed herself to let her pent-up emotions flow forward. She loved him so much it ached deep within.   
With emotions of adoration fading into desire Chat somehow, through some miracle came from above and not of his own will, managed to figure out how to break away from her. He rested a forehead against hers relearning how to breathe. At some point her legs had ended up around his waist and the zipper to his suit was lower than it should have been. He longed to continue with her but…it wouldn’t be right for many reasons he hated coming up with. They were still kids and really shouldn’t be going so far, she didn’t even know who he was, she hadn’t worked up the courage to tell him the truth, he was not that kind of guy, and a few others things he would have remember if she would stop doing that thing with her fingers.   
Mari tapped a finger against his chest. “You’re a good kisser.” She looked up at him sharply face turning bright red as she realized the words she had just been thinking had tumbled out of her mouth with no restraint. She buried her face in her hands doing her best to ignore Chat’s ringing laughter at her embarrassment.   
“You’re adorable.” She could hear the smile in his face.   
“Shut up.”  
Mari wasn’t sorry for kissing him, nor would she regret it. Here and now, in this moment it was just Chat and Marinette. She was free to be completely herself with him and with the easy laugh he shared with her she knew it was the same.   
As always, Chat stayed long into the night. Long enough that he entertained the idea that he could spend the night and wake up early enough to make it too school on time. He hated when he had to leave her. Every night that he left her it felt as if part of him had been nailed to her and he could feel himself pulled in two directions.   
They stood on her balcony dreading the goodbye while simultaneously eagerly waiting for next time they would see each other. Chat hopped on the railing staff extending where he needed it to go.   
Mari gripped his sleeve. “Be safe.”   
He gave her a toothy grin. “Safety’s my middle name.”  
“Chat.” Her other hand gripped the front of his suit and pulled him in for one last kiss. The contrast between the one they had shared previously was almost heart breaking. There was such a tenderness about it that something shifted with in Marinette.   
Chat extended his staff and disappeared into the night leaving Mari with a feeling of longing so intense her hand rested over her chest in an attempt to rub away the pain.   
“Oh boy,” she whispered.


	6. Chapter 6

Adrien gazed at Marinette from a distance, chin resting on an open text book. There was something strange, different about her today. The usual flirtatious banter had felt as if she were reading from a script. He frowned slightly.   
A sharp smack upside his head jerked him into an upright position. “Ow!”  
Nino gave him a look. “You’re staring, dude. It’s really uncool.”   
Adrien rubbed the back of his head and glared at his friend. He hated math and it was hard to concentrate when his friend say across the way spacing out so badly that her pencil had dropped from her hand. It would have been cute if her face didn’t have such a worried look on her face.   
He wanted to ask her if she was okay but Adrien couldn’t figure out how to do it without somehow slipping up and bringing up the make out session they had had nearly 10 hours before. Face flushing bright red he buried it in his text book and prayed for time to move faster.   
His thoughts stressed on the fact that he was the very person that she loved both sides to and he felt the growing anxiety over the fact that he knew everything and she knew nothing. What is she was furious when she eventually found out that he had kept quiet for so long. Eventually school ended and his spinning mind was forced to come to a halt. Plagg had even chewed him out for the game he was playing with Marinette.   
But it wasn’t a game. If it was a game it wouldn’t hurt so much. It wouldn’t ache this much. He wanted to talk with her. He wanted to talk to her like he did every night but that was Chat. He was Adrien. He was school friend who sometimes hung out at her house after school. He couldn’t be the friend that knew the innerworkings of her thought process.   
“Are you alright?” he asked her after the final bell finally rang. “You’ve been spacing out more than usual.”   
The blush that usually graced her cheeks when he spoke with her seemed noticeably less vibrant.   
“I-I’m fine,” she managed.   
He shouldered his bag. “Are you sure? Seems like you’ve got a lot on your mind.”  
Mari looked up into Adrien’s curious face. Normally his gaze would send her into a stuttering, blushing mess leaving her scrambling for what language she should be speaking.   
The effect of his attention on her still had an effect but the reaction she had to had diminished immensely. She wondered as to why long enough that a small flicker of realization came into view. She had to make a choice. She could no longer love two people as she did. She would have to choose one. She could not divide her love any longer.   
“Tough choice by the looks of things.”   
Mari hadn’t realized she uttered her thoughts until he spoke. Mari did her best to ignore Alya’s frantic gestures behind Adrien. She knew what her best friend had intended to indicate through her sporadic movements but she wasn’t sure if she would be able to gather the courage.   
Adrien fought off the irritated frown he wanted to throw at Nino. If he would stop waving his arms around like an idiot maybe Adrien could focus and help Marinette. “Do you think I can help?” he asked after throwing a cutting gesture at his friend.   
Alya’s movement increased with vigor to the point that Marinette was sure her friend had achieved quite the workout.   
“You know,” Mari thought “I think you can.” And cue the blush for saying something so bold.   
Adrien smiled at her and the blush deepened. “Cool, what can I do?”  
Her voice died. What she needed him to do sounded like a date and she couldn’t just ask him like that.  
She screamed a desperate eye plea at her friend and only met a broad smile in return. She waved her towards the side walk. Just go outside and walk. Right, she could do that, simple enough right? She clutched her book close to her chest and turned on her toes. She would have been proud of the movement had she not nearly met the floor with her face on her way out the door.   
After a stress filled walk with Avery at her heels she finally managed to get over her embarrassment enough that she could slow down and let him walk next to her.   
Today was the day. She had to choose. She didn’t want to. If she could she would hold onto both for as long as she could but she couldn’t keep lying to them both and doing so would only grow the lie until it was too big to stop and it would eventually explode and all of Paris would be caught in the blast. She shook the image out of her head and returned back to her altering reality.   
The park appeared and she took towards the nearest bench. She worried that if she kept walking she’d chicken out and try to run from her problems. She sat quickly and a little harsher than she had intended. Adrien’s puzzled look at he sat down next to her let her know she’d been acting weirder than normal.   
She stared at her thumbs as they danced around each other hunching under the growing silence.   
“So,” Adrien’s voice struggled in. “What’s the big choice?” He waited until she managed to straighten up and sucked in a breath. The last time they had hung out alone they had played video games.   
“Have you ever liked two people at the same time?” She blurted.   
Oh, she had no idea. He’d have to be careful with this or he’d unleash a can of worms that would be eaten by birds in the matter of seconds.   
“Romantically?” Of course, she meant romantically buy he couldn’t say anything about that. She’d instantly wonder who it was and then he’d have to come up with someone and probably subject two innocent girls under the gaze of her scrutiny. He couldn’t tell her especially when both happened to be her.   
“I…I have this,” she sighed. “I have this situation.” I like these two boys. One is always incredibly kind, always thinking of others, and he does his best to be seen as just an average boy instead of some superstar.”  
“Superstar?” He put just enough inflection into his voice to earn a deep reddening of her cheeks. She was just too easy sometimes.   
She managed to stutter out an excuse before he let her off the hook. She just looked so cute when she was flustered.   
“What’s the other guy like?”  
She gave him a searching look before staring at her hands again. “He’s kind, just as considerate even if he’s a little vane.”  
Adrien stiffened slightly. He wasn’t vane. He wasn’t.   
“He always fights by my side, does his best to protect me without taking away my own strength, and…I can talk to him.   
“They seem like pretty good guys,” Adrien said as he relaxed against the bench.   
“Yeah well,” she said a bit defeated. “You can’t love two things equally. You can only love one person with your whole heart.”   
Adrien felt a thrill skitter across his chest and squeeze his heart. She loved him?   
Marinette felt the impact of what she said land squarely against her chest. She’s basically told Adrien she loved him to his face but he didn’t know that. She couldn’t take it back either. Once the words were said they are out there, forever!  
He smiled broadly at her and the feeling in her chest lightened. If felt as if Adrien was really smiling. As if this was the first time he’d ever smiled. The best part was that it wasn’t in response to what she said but her.   
“You love them huh? What’s the difference between them?”  
For a second Adrien considered the weirdness of this conversation. He had just sked her to compare himself, with himself.   
She thought for a moment. “The first guy, Tom, we’ll call him, I’ve known since the beginning of first year in high school.” She wanted to elaborate, but then he would know. She couldn’t let him know.   
“At first I had him totally wrong. It wasn’t until the end of the day that I saw his kindness. That’s when the crush started. I knew him for less than 24 hours and I had an almost instant crush.   
Adrien remembered that day. He never realized her crush had started clear at the beginning. His heart thudded painfully in his chest. He was such a blind idiot.   
“He’s always so nice. He wants everyone around him to be happy but he’s not afraid to tell someone when they’re being a jerk.” She smiled fondly at him. The action left him missing a few key pathways to his brain.   
“He’s really such a great guy.”  
Something felt off about the way she said it. “I feel a ‘but’ in there.”  
She sighed heavily in a way that made him want to hold her. “I can’t talk to him the way that I can with Cha-Chris.” Mari bit her cheek harshly. She’d almost spilled everything right then and there. Idiot.   
“What do you mean?”  
She leaned back against the bench acutely away of how close his resting arm was to her shoulders. “Well, it wasn’t until recently, I wasn’t able to talk to him at all. It’d turn into a stumbling mess. Sometimes we could have actual conversation but whenever it came to how I felt about him I couldn’t even remember what language I was supposed to speak.”  
“Why’s Chris different?”  
Adrien had a sudden flash of a time when Marinette had been so flustered that she’d ended with a frantic strange arm movement. Alya had to translate. He took a side glance at her and noticed she seemed to have finally relaxed.   
Again, Adrien felt the incredibly odd feeling of this conversation settle onto his shoulders. Either way, he would win. He was get to have both Ladybug and Marinette no matter what. However, she was only going to choose the real him or the one that had to hide. This was all very confusing.   
“We ran into each other a couple times. At first he was just someone who kind of annoyed me.” Adrien prickled at that.   
“But then his stupid humor started to make me laugh. He’s brave, he’s selfless. I’ve seen him go through things I didn’t think anyone could. He makes me happy. We talk about anything and everything. At first he was just my friend. I’d tell him about my crush and he’d tell me about his. And then one day it just happened out of the blue.   
A faint warm glow settle on her cheeks. She touched her lips as the memory and feel of that first seemingly forbidden kiss burned its way into her mind and made her skin come alive with fire. She remembered with such a clarity and intensity that it scared her and both warmed her at the same time.   
Just listen to her Adrien knew who she had chosen even if she didn’t. But just like her, the night with the light of the lamp casting a soft glow on her face and the small and taste of fresh cookies dominating the air he recalled the kiss with the same clear intensity.   
“I think you’ve already decided,” he said quietly  
The hint of tears glistened in her eyes. “I know, but it still hurts. It hurts so much.” The tears found their way down her cheeks and landed like fallen stars onto her limps hands. “I feel like I’m collapsing but how can I fall apart when I feel so happy?”   
She lost her composer and crumbled in on herself. Her sobs came then, harsh and uncontrolled. The physically pain he felt over her torment tore into him and he pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. She gripped the front of his shirt so tightly in response he felt the sting of her finger nails.   
God it hurt. She’s chosen, and in doing so she’s given up on a future she had dreamed of, had hoped for. The walls of her heart broke into a billion shards as the room she held for an old flame went under renovation to fit something greater. The process proved painful.   
Adrien held her like he had in the closet and listen to the sound of sorrow. He hated. He wasn’t to protect her form anything like this ever happening again. He hated that the last two times he had held her like this she’d cried bitterly. He couldn’t count the last kiss. That hadn’t been long enough. This felt like it went on forever.   
Eventually, emotions finally released and her morning spent, Marinette finally released her tight hold of Adrien. She sniffed once, hard, and unfortunately, a little grossly.   
“Sorry I ruined your shirt.”   
Adrien shrugged and run a thumb under an eye. “I can wash it went I get home.”   
She smiled sadly at him. “Thank you, for being here.”  
A faint smile quirked the corner of his mouth and he wiped under her other eye. “No problem.”   
Marinette stood then, releasing Adrien from the stress of wanting to do more. She bent down, surprising him, and placed a kiss on his forehead. Had he been Chat he would have basked in it. As it was he froze and stared at her with wide eyes.   
“Marinette?”  
She tucked a fly away strand of hair behind her ear. “See you tomorrow, Adrien.”  
Marinette disappearing around the corner Adrien collapsed against the bench and felt himself weirdly at war. She’d chosen Chat over him. What the hell was he jealous? He was Chat for crying out loud! Everything about his situation just felt too weird. She’d chosen him, over himself.


	7. Chapter 7

Enemy defeated and victor achieved Ladybug and Chat Nior stood on the roof top overlooking the River Seine facing the Eiffel Tower. The sun had gone down leaving the sky with a deep orange glow in the distance while the light from the city rose to shine their soft yellow in contrast.   
Ladybug had been acting weird for nearly two weeks and it was starting to freak Chat out. When he’d question her about it a few days ago she’d blushed bright red and told him not to worry about it before petting his head.   
He remembered watching her leave while the tingle of her fingers in his head remains. He wasn’t really going to complain but it felt like such a 180 turn. Chat had strong suspicions that it had to do with the conversation he’d had with Marinette in the park. But even before then he’d noticed her cracking a smile at his jokes or, if he was really lucky. She’d blush at certain proximities. Now it was as if she could barely talk to him and he found it so irritating he couldn’t stop fidgeting with his tail.   
She’d be 100% business during a fight and then after they had gotten the job done it would be shy glances and mumbled responses. He thought it cute at first and now he just wanted to shake her and have a real conversation.   
So there they stood watching the natural light of day fade away to artificial. He did his best to ignore the awkward silence that had started to grow large and heavy above them.   
Ladybug grippe her yoyo harshly in her hand feeling the crevasse bit into her palm. She waiting with barely controlled anxiety for the beep that would come. She’d return to Marinette. She avoided her panicked thoughts as best she could or she wouldn’t be able to stand there any longer and she’d run, again.   
It had taken her weeks to work up the courage. She wouldn’t be able to stand it any longer if Chat grew fonder of one side of her and less of the other. She’d been so afraid of his rejecting her that she hadn’t been able to talk to him. The fear had ruled her for too long and she would put it to a stop tonight. Hopefully…if she didn’t chicken out again.   
Doing her best to quite he frayed nerves she forced herself to walk up next to Chat and stand firmly by his side feeling the back of her knuckles brush against his hand. Normally she’d be able to reach out and touch him with ease. Now here she was feeling like a stupid grade schooler with the amount of jumbled nerves rushing through her. This is ridiculous.  
When Chat gripped a single finger gently she stiffened in surprise before allowing herself to relax. It was now or never.   
“Don’t let go or I might run,” she whispered. She hated how shaky it sounded. Strong, confident Ladybug was about to exit the stage and she would just be Marinette.   
“I won’t,” he whispered back sliding his hand deeper into hers.   
Was this it? Was this the moment where he would know?  
They listened together as her miraculous sounded the alarm. They waiting in silence together as the beeps drew away the remaining time until at least. The final sound rang out into the silence.   
Ladybugs eyes slammed shut as the familiar fill of water rushing against over took her taking the power of her alter ego with her. Her body stiffened as it progressed until at last, all that was left was a tingle on her nose. She kept still in a useless attempt to remain invisible.   
She waited for some type of reaction from Chat. Holding her breathe she braced for the moment when he would finally see the truth. Seconds stretched into hours and finally, unable to hold it in any longer her lungs expelled the air within in a rush that blew her bangs out of her face. Slowly, she peered through her tightly sealed eyes.   
What she saw was Chat staring towards the sparkling tower. His hand felt warm in hers.   
A tiny smiled teased at the corner of his lips. “Trying to win some type of award, Princess?”  
“I…” what was he waiting for? Why hadn’t he looked? He’d always wanted to see the girl under the mask so why was he waiting? Something clicked. He had been waiting for her permission. Even after all this time fighting side by side and asking time and time again he wasn’t going to look until she told him otherwise.   
With speed of her thoughts something finally slipped through.   
“What did you call me?” The words came out slowly and almost felt as if she had them in a dream. The way his body froze as if hit by a heavy blow proved to be her answer.   
Idiot! He’d made it this far, this long without one screw up and now here he was. He could have sworn her heard the crack has her heart split. He’d called her the wrong name. Damn it! It was all over now. She’d would be so upset with him. He’d never told her the truth because he couldn’t reveal her identity for her. She had to do it on her own. If the situation wasn’t so dire he would have laughed. Everything had come down to a singular second and he had blown it like atomic proportions.   
“Chat…” she felt too shocked to have any other emotion. It was as if the one word had drained her of everything and now she felt empty.   
He slowly turned towards her. He didn’t want to. He wanted to go back in time, call her by the right nick name and all of this would not be happening. The part of his life he was about to go through could have been avoided but now he’d have to face the storm head on and try to survive. He’d dreamed about this day, when everything could be out in the open. But this was the one thing he wanted to tell her long down the line.   
Any hope he had for his dreams shattered when he caught sight of her face. The sorrow he’d seen in the park looked like joy in comparison.   
The feeling of betrayal soaked into the heart starting it’s work on changing the color. He knew? All this time he’d know who she was? How could he not say anything? He could he just lie to her face? Tears welled hot and heavy against the frozen lock of her eyes. She couldn’t do anything other than stare at him. Gradually, like that of a slowly melting ice sculpture the tears melted her frozen features.   
“You didn’t say anything…” Her voice carried softly to him but even so it felt as if he’d been shot. Pain blossomed through his chest and he fought the urge to check and see if his suite had been stained with red.   
She was right to be upset with him. He knew her deepest darkest secret and hadn’t said anything. What was he supposed to tell her?   
“You knew exactly who I was. Did it even cross your mind to say anything?”   
He wanted to speak, hold her, scream out, laugh at the horrible reality before him. He wanted to do anything other than be here, right in this moment.   
Her delicate fingers gripped the bottom of her shirt as if it was the only thing left to protect her. “You just let me believe you cared.”   
“That’s not true!” he burst out. Didn’t she know him at all? The hell he didn’t care. He made the choice to visit her. He’d fallen in love and chosen to stay that way. That had all been him.   
“How can you say that?” she bit back. “You knew. You knew who I was and you never told me. You played games with me!” Fury rose hot and thick within her stomach. She didn’t want to hurt. She wanted to be angry. Anger felt better, stronger. Stale tears continued to run down her steal mask of rage. Torn between the need to curl in on herself and wallow in the pain and the urge to beat his face into an unrecognizable mess Marinette found her shaking ruining the quite rage she fought for. She felt caught between violence and defeat.   
“You know that’s not true. I’d never hurt you, at least not intentionally.”   
Logic argued the he was right. He’d never done anything to cause her pain. The hurricane inside begged to differ. Everything hurt so strongly her need to run and escape into the night grew. But how could she run? She wasn’t Ladybug anymore. She didn’t have that kind of power. Besides, she couldn’t get down off the roof top. The only way down was for Chat to carry her and she didn’t want him within throwing distance.   
The thick dark cloud inside seemed to leach out of her and taint the soft glow around her. Her breath came harsher and she found herself fighting for control, any type of control. She’d been so terrified that he’d reject her. Instead the knowledge that he’d known her secret had blown through her existence leaving her feeling broken.   
“You lied to me.” Her voice sounded so flat, empty, a complete contrast to how she felt on the inside.   
Chat took a step towards her. At her small flinch and a hurried step back forced him to remain where he was. Part of him died with that singular motion. This was everything he didn’t want to be. The possibility of losing her made it hard to breathe. They’d done too much together, said too many things. She was everything. He couldn’t let her go, not without dying in the process, not when he loved her this much. But…but if she asked for it, if she needed it he would give her time even though it would destroy him.   
“I never lied,” he answered finally. “If you had asked me I would have told you. I never lied.”  
“But you let me think. I talked to you about incredibly private things. I told you secrets not even Alya knows.” She hated the way her voice trembled. She wanted to be cold. She didn’t want so much emotion that it welled over into tears. It showed she cared too much.   
He nodded his head in agreement. “I’m your friend, that’s what friends do.”  
“Oh you’re my friend now?” Even as the words left her mouth she knew it sounded petty and snide. Marinette wanted to hit him. She’d wanted to be something so much more. She knew that was what had been going on. He wasn’t just a friend anymore.  
“I can be your friend as well as-” his tongue tripped and he stuttered his way around the next bit, “as s-someone who can kiss you…”   
Was this for real? The situation felt so delicate, sensitive even and he had the nerve to blush? Could things be easy for once in his life?   
“I let you kiss me.” Her hands fisted at her sides.   
“Let me?” He scoffed incredulously his blush vanishing beneath his mask. “You started most of them!”  
“You always took them to the next level,” she growled.   
“Oh right, because climbing into my lap was my idea. Who gave who the hickies?” he pointed at her.   
Her mouth snapped shut. She tried to utter a response that only resulted in a series of offended noises. “You!” she pointed right back. “You still lied to me!”  
“I never lied!” he fired back.   
“I trusted you.” Anger quick and strong warmed the ache in her chest. He wanted to yell. She could yell. “You never told me you knew who I was!”  
“You never asked!”  
“How was I supposed to know!” You should have told me. How long huh? How long have you known that I was Ladybug and Ladybug was me? When did you know? You saw me revert, didn’t you? You promised me you’d never look and you did!”   
“I didn’t find out like that. You know me! You know I would never do that.”  
“Do I?” She cried, “Do I know you? Because from everything that just happened I know you like to lead me around in circles pretending you care, pretending that I’m just some stupid girl who you can play around with. You know what? You’re just a big selfish bast-“  
“Marinette!”


	8. Chapter 8

“Marinette!” A small red blur zipped into focus coming to a stop in front of her charge. Tiny hands placed firmly on hips, Marinette had never seen Tikki so angry before.  
“Tikki?”  
“Marinette if you would just calm down for two seconds a think you would be able to get the answers you want. Yelling isn’t going to solve anything and it certainly isn’t going to make you feel any better. Chat would never lie to you and you know that.”  
Marinette tried to argue but the tiny kwami interrupted her. “You’re not asking the right questions Marinette. Why wouldn’t he say. All you’re doing is stating a fact but you’re not asking why. Take a second to think about it Marinette. You’re smart so work it through.”  
It felt weird to be scolded by Tikki. Tikki had berated her. Usually she had words of encouragement for her. Instead she’d put a foot down. But Mari didn’t want to listen. She wanted to be angry. She didn’t care about the why, she only cared that he’d done it.  
“Listen Marinette, whenever there was a chance of you finding out the identity of the other who was it that suggested otherwise? Who was it that was never ready?” Tikki settled on her charges shoulder.  
With no other choice Marinette forced away her temper and asked the questions she’d been avoiding. She stared hard at Chat. “When did you find out?”  
Just for a moment, long enough that it left him reeling, he remembered with harsh vivid clarity the feel of her blood against his hands and how bright it has looked against her shirt and how the color seemed to stain his hands. He remembered the way her mask had crumbled bringing both of his worlds crashing so violently together it was a wonder they weren’t destroyed.  
“You were hurt,” he finally managed. “Dying, actually.” At her lack of response, he continued. “The akuma had torn through your miraculous. You slammed into the ground so hard that it started to crumble away. You were bleeding everywhere.”  
He rubbed his hands in as he remembered how he’d tried to keep her blood where it belonged. “Your mask gave way and suddenly my worlds collided. I had thought it was impossible to love two people at the same time and I was right.”  
He fidgeted unaware that he had been slowly chipping away at her walls. “I couldn’t tell you because I didn’t want to take that choice away from you. I wanted you to tell me on your own.”  
Now what was she supposed to do? She felt too angry at him. What’d he done he’d done for her sake. Even so, she clung to the idea that he should have told her anyways.  
She’d always known his feelings for Ladybug. That had been one of the things that had hurt the worst. She wasn’t Ladybug. He should have been disappointed but instead he’d simply been waiting. She’d prepared for the possible rejection for so long that she didn’t know how to handle the acceptance. She wasn’t deaf either. The words of Love ran in her ears and she refused to down it out.  
“Then who are you?” she asked slowly, as if frightened of the answer.  
Chat’s demeanor changed. He’d been moving as if he might scare her off. How his face flushed a bright red. One had rubbed the back of his head while he stood stock still and straight as a board.  
“I-uh…well,” he stammered out. This was going to be the weirdest moment. Marinette had just chosen Chat over Adrien and she was about to get one hell of a surprise.  
“Chat please, I need to know.”  
He looked to Tikki for help but she only grinned at him.  
“Just…just don’t freak out.”  
Marinette wasn’t sure she had room inside of her to “freak out.”  
Stealing his nerves and quieting he inner voice that screamed how much of a bad idea this was he released and explosive sigh and said the words that always removed his miraculous from his skin.  
“Plagg, revert me.”  
Green light ran playfully up his legs at different speeds before caressing his fingers. The speed ran oddly until all that was left was a shoulder and his mask. Should he keep his eyes open? Should he close them? What would her expression be like?  
Marinette blinked harshly. The oxygen in her lungs forgot which way was out. If she could have she would have looked for the truck that had just slammed into her. Adrien Agreste stood before her every bit the embodiment of a shy persona.  
“Adrien?” she squeaked.  
He waved nervously at her. “Hi…”  
“But, but I let you go. I chose Chat. I chose him. I…Oh my God.” Fire exploded across her body. “At school…you flirted with me.”  
He grinned sheepishly at her. “I couldn’t help it.”  
“A-and the teasing?”  
“You were just so cute and you made it too easy.”  
She sucked in a harsh breath as the realization that she’d been making out with Adrien Agreste on and off again slammed into her. She made a tiny mouse of a noise and covered her mouth. “Our conversation,” her said her voice muffled by her hands. “at the park…”  
He nodded. “It was weird, for me.”  
“You asked me to compare you with…you.”  
His smile grew slightly. “For the record I’m very flattered.”  
Marinette buried the rest of her face in her hands. She’d finally chosen and to find out her choice had been in vain. There had been no choice to begin with. Chat and Adrien had been the same person.  
Gentle fingers gripped her and revealed her to the world. She studied him. The same Bright green eyes, same cheeky smile, hair, and even the voice were all the same. She felt so stupid. How did she miss it? The resemblance was like someone had shown a spot light in her face and asked her if it was bright.  
He laughed at her expression the sound warming her to her toes. “I know how you feel. I think our Miraculous have a large part in hiding our identities.  
She looked at her hand in his. His hands felt so strong and warm. “I’m still upset with you,” she mumbled with a sniff. “But I’ll get over it.”  
She raised her head to meet him only to have him suddenly sweep her close. His lips crashed into hers and a flood of heat ran through her. That kiss had made any experience pale in comparison. She felt like her brain had melted through her skull and decided it would make its way through her body. Before things could progress to much better places he forced her away and made her meet his eyes.  
“No more secrets,” he told her firmly.  
She bit her lip and nodded. She was glad he was holding her. Her knees were a little broken. “No more secrets,” she agreed.  
He let go of her and she could have cried at the loss of contact.  
“Am I really that sexy though with my “dark and mysterious” grin?  
Marinette opened her mouth in an attempt to say something…anything. How in the world had he known that?  
He laughed and it felt so free and light that it made her realize that what Chat had told her had been right. As Adrien, he had only ever been known as the model and a rich man’s son. But up here, far above the world he was free to be himself.  
He rested his forehead against her and Marinette found herself mimicking his content grin. “You know,” she muttered. “This isn’t exactly how I thought this would go.”  
“Oh really? Were you thinking this would be an even bigger catastrophe than the episode we just experienced?” He reached a hand down and played with her fingers. She like the tingle that ran clean up to her elbow.  
At her silence, he blew his bangs out of his face. “You thought I would be disappointed that you were Ladybug.”  
Right on the money. She shrunk a bit.  
“Apparently making out with you and driving myself to extreme sleep exhaustion didn’t tell you anything.”  
“Hey,” she protested.  
He settled a finger under her chin lifting her face until their noses touched. “Silly princess, as if I’d want anyone else.” He kissed her again.  
How had he managed it? she wondered. He’d made this utter train wreck of a night turn into one hell of an awesome date. After a long delightful moment on the roof he’d led her down the fire escape that had gone unnoticed. Hand in hand he’d let her to the nearest coffee shop, ordered her favorite drink, which had surprised her, and then spent the rest of the night talking with her about everything. Everything included drink spitting laughter as he had recounted some rather embarrassing situations he’d ended up in after reverting earlier than planned as well as a few tender moments had he talked about his mom with a kindness that had Mari wishing she could meet her.  
She settled her chin in her hand listening as he recounted a tale as he had decided that taking his wagon down the steepest hill had started like a good idea and the lengths his mother had gone too to make sure he didn’t land in the giant mud puddle at the bottom. How did she get so lucky? How did she find someone just so…perfect? After so much pain, and heartache here she was drinking coffee with the boy she loved and the world was right. Marinette Dupain Cheng had a good life.


End file.
